Cabin Fever (2016)

So I ordered Showtime in order to watch Twin Peaks, and was glad to have another source of streaming because I am so tired of and down on Netflix. And I saw that this was available among the movies there, and was like “Oh good, I’ll be happy to revisit that, it was a fun…

Twin Peaks: The Return Parts 1-4

After the cliffhanger of Twin Peaks season one, and the long hiatus between seasons, I was glued to the TV at the premiere of season two… and was surprised to be greeted with an extremely slow episode in which a giant spoke to an unconscious Agent Cooper for 30 minutes, with no new answers or…

Oceans Rising

As you know, bad movies aren’t what they used to be, now that anyone can make a digital film and CGI effects are starting to be available [in shitty form, but still…] to anyone, meaning you no longer have any home-made giant squids and whatnot. And then, to my annoyance, Netflix seems allergic to carrying…

Alien: Covenant

Okay, so let’s start from the place that the only reason this film exists is to make more money. Secondary to that, Ridley Scott said back during Prometheus times that he thought people would be dying to know where the engineer in the first film came from [personally I do not give a flying fuck…

The Adventures of Robin Hood

Having read Howard Pyle’s perfectly delightful book on Robin Hood, become a little bit obsessed with the Robin Hood legends, and watched as much as I could of the Kevin Costner debacle, I became curious to see the big famous Errol Flynn film. It’s one of those movies I’ve seen clips of forever, but never…

King Arthur: Legend of the Sword

I had sworn to never see a Guy Ritchie movie again after the insult and injury of Sherlock Holmes, which I hated to the core of my being. Plus, I had read and loved Sherlock Holmes novels and stories, and hated seeing them destroyed in such an idiotic way. I’m also in the process of…

The Circle

The weak novel is now an even weaker movie! I tend not to read contemporary fiction because, honestly, they’re usually mediocre, but I read Dave Egger’s novel The Circle because I am fascinated by the huge tech companies and the social effects all this technology is having [and: it was mediocre]. The novel presents a…